There are people who will aim others at their chosen target. This gang mentality is a way to rationalize the abuse since it isn’t being delivered directly.
This is not about arguing what’s right or wrong, or what’s in the legal orders. Those things are black and white. This is about CREATING modes of attack when all other means have been exhausted.
You cannot judge whether or not someone is a victim of emotional/mental abuse by outward appearances of any sort. We learn to mask our shame and pain.
I truly don’t remember a time in my life when I did not feel shame. We’re not talking about the same thing as guilt.
That’s what happens when you spend your days in an emotional foxhole, trying to anticipate another person’s moods and make sense of crazy
Co-parenting requires both parents to have rational discussions about raising children.
Just as “domestic violence” is sometimes misunderstood as being physical beatings only, boundaries are sometimes misunderstood as being confrontational.
I never thought of myself as an addict, but I was. I was addicted to an abuser. When I got out, the first thing I had to do was akin to a 12-step program.
What to do when you’re forced to have contact or some form of interaction with our abuser? There are a few schools of thought on how to stop being a target
One of the phenomena I spoke of before is “abuse by proxy”. This is a well-known and predictable response by an abuser who has reached a point of desperation and uses other means to intimidate, harass or otherwise continue the abuse.