I discovered 4 specific actions that helped me to learn to forgive myself and, repeated over time, took me to a new place in my healing.
Many survivors buy into the idea that the process of forgiving and letting go also means never getting mad about the abuse again. Nothing could be less true
Let us reclaim forgiveness, as a tool for empowerment not a sign of submission. Forgiveness should be more about letting go than turning the other cheek.
This question comes up quite a bit when I talk to survivors: Why is my abuser so successful? Many abusers are mostly very successful at projecting an image.
It took many years for me to understand that guilt and shame are two entirely different things with vastly different impacts.
Mags shares some concepts and tools that she finds useful when trying to be resilient while experiencing complex (negative) emotions.
Guilt is a complex emotion, but one survivors of abuse are intimately familiar with. The experience of abuse is -among many other complicated things- the world biggest guilt trip.
In the aftermath of abuse, we often have to deal with a myriad of PTSD triggers. Daily life was abuse, now daily life is a reminder of that abuse. By that I mean that sometimes the most normal activities and events can trigger memories and emotional flashbacks. That means that the most mundane tasks can become very difficult to manage.
Are you supporting someone with PTSD? If you are here to find out how you can better help them, I want you to know how awesome you are!
The thing about PTSD and recovery is that it’s complex. It’s not as simples as 1 2 3 you’re fixed. There were definitely times that I thought some of my problems were PTSD specific, but it turned out that some things were just general, across-the-board human experiences.