Wish you could make your child to see their abusive spouse, your siblings to see your toxic parents? No matter the context, if they’re not ready they won’t see the abuse. Here are some ways in which you can support someone you love.
I wanted to talk to you how toxic people push us beyond our limits in the name of “facing our fears”. They push us so far that we get into panic mode.
There is so much freedom in that kind of forgiveness, rather than the type of forgiveness that kept us emotionally enslaved.
Recently a dear friend and fellow-survivor lost her toxic mother and it got us to talking about grief. I sometimes wonder how I will respond when I find out.
So let me start by saying that the positive we will we consider here is not some perky-pants denial accompanied by a chirpy, “Oh, I’m fine!” Why? You aren’t fine.
I think one of my mother’s favorite defenses was: I was only trying to help. It is a great anger stopper. How can you continue to yell at someone who was only trying to help? However misguided the help, she was acting with the best of intentions. Right? Wrong!
There are days when you think nothing would be more satisfying than stooping to their level. Please climb back up to that high road if you can manage…
When you first think of going no contact with your abuser, you may think that it’s as simple as just ignoring the phone calls. There is more to it than that.
Negative experiences are part of life, and they do not really mean anything. Most people can shrug these experiences off quite easily, but with a bully in your head, it is all too easy to follow your own thoughts down the Whirlpool of Depression. So what we need to do is evict the bully! Shut them up and we will be able to simply move past the negative experience and continue on our merry way.
When abuse never takes any physical form, it can be tough to feel sure it ever happened. After all, everybody makes mistakes… no parent is perfect. Right?