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I am in my early fifties and have always known there was something wrong with my mother. My mother never encouraged me to be what I wanted, rather to be what she wanted me to be. I was the family caretaker, the empathizer, the fixer and confidante instead of ever being a daughter who was loved.

Cutting Contact

Three years ago I realized that my mother would never change from being the selfish and ungrateful person she is. She is unable to accept responsibility for any decision she ever made. I made a critical choice at that time, I would no longer be in her life and more to the point she would no longer be in mine. This is a decision that has totally turned my life around.

On the Right Path

Never managing to accomplish any achievements in the working world I am now turning things around. I have already done a year at college to gain some qualifications, because deep down I know I can prove my worthiness to myself and those I hope to help in the future. Most of all I feel a happiness and contentment because at last I am on the right path, a path that will help me make a difference to women like me.

My mother did not appreciate my efforts to cut her out and many times she left me voice mails to say I should listen to her and not other people, that I never let her defend herself, but I did listen to her for many, many years and lived to regret it. For the first time ever I began to feel empowered that I had a choice and was exercising my right to make it.

A Sense of Being Overwhelmed

I remember feeling so overwhelmed by all the memories that surfaced and making sense of them. It sent me on a downward spiral for a while, the pain, the hurt, the realization that everything was all a lie and this included relatives she made up. I didn’t know how much more I could take until I found a community who gave me an insight into how my trouble parent operates. What I discovered there was that my mother wasn’t the only raging, verbally and emotionally abusive woman around, there are thousands of them out there, and from then on I knew I was not the only one, I had sisters and that is what has changed my life.

Feeling Connected for the First Time

I have also found a wonderful group of women to connect and work with and all this because I chose to say No to my mother.For me cutting contact was the hardest and bravest decision I ever made and I am so thankful I did.

If you are reading this I hope it inspires you to know:

1. You are not alone
2. We are here to support you
3. There is life after emotional abuse
4. Your life can be yours

we love to read your comments below


One comment:

  1. Profile photo of Nazrana
    Nazrana

    May 6, 2014 at 3:41 am

    Reply

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