Leaving an abusive situation is hard!
Leaving your abuser is not a clear cut process. It is tough. It takes on average 7 attempts for a target to leave their abuser.
Get help by finding out more about no contact, dealing with parenting issues and proxy abusers.
This is a great way to claim success. As is connecting to fellow survivors for support and validation.
In the process of leaving or struggling to stay away from an ex-partner or parent? You are in the right place.
- Find out the do’s and don’ts of no contact
- Identify and deal with proxy abusers
- Learn strategies to co-parent with a toxic ex
- Deal with family dynamic after no contact
Our Top 3 Resources
More Articles Like These
Below is an overview of articles that will help you when you are getting out of the abusive situation, and while you are begin building your new life. We don’t just talk about getting out, we also talk about staying out. Don’t be fooled staying out is not as easy as it sounds and it takes on average 7 attempts for a target to leave an abuser. So, be kind to yourself and take all the help you can get! Join our Community of Survivors to talk about your story and get the support you need to cut ties.
Leaving an abuser is no easy task. Not just because of the likely increase of abuse but also because we have emotional connections to our abusers. Here is some information on the specific push and pull of the abusive relationship
Why You Should Leave an Abuser (podcast)
No contact is often misunderstood as being punishment for our abuser. It is in fact a way to protect ourselves from further abuse and create a safe place for our healing.
No Contact 101 (video)
No Contact is Not as Simple as It Sounds (podcast)
The Do’s and Don’ts of No Contact (podcast)
When the Going Gets Tough
The road of recovery knows many peaks and valleys. On days when you face particular challenges, when you feel you cannot go on, or even when you have to deal with your abuser… Here are some ideas and tactics to help you deal and strengthen your resolve to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Blame, Guilt, Shame, Doubt… The Tough Stuff
There is a lot of icky emotions and feelings to deal with. Guilt, blame, anger, shame, doubt… all those feeling that make us feel uncomfortable. We may feel like pushing it all down, so we don’t have to go through it all. Trust us, if you do that it will all come spilling out in 10 fold later on. Better to face the music and process this all.
Preparing Yourself for Healing
Leaving your abuser is a big step in empowering yourself. However, there is still much more healing to do. These articles will get you started on that journey and will help you prepare yourself for the work that lies ahead.
Parenting With a Toxic Ex or After an Abusive Childhood
When there are children in the picture, you will want some help dealing with their trauma and learn of ways to deal with your toxic ex. We have resources for that as well! Also, we recommend that you read some of the articles about toxic families so you can better understand the dynamic that your children were perhaps dealing with.
Co-Parenting with a Toxic Person (podcast)
4 Hard Lessons about the Abuser, Kids, and Holidays (about visitation, also useful when it is not December)
Flying Monkeys (Abuse by Proxy)
Abusers rarely abuse alone. They recruit people to reinforce and even perform some of the abuse. They may use the courts to continue the abuse during and after the divorce for example. Here is some information on how to spot the proxy abusers, and how to deal with them.