Two Women Sitting Outside House Laughing

I know we have all been there, that moment where we had to decide to trust someone. When you are still reeling with the feelings of betrayal, who can you trust?

In a recent blog post we published on learning to trust again, Mags said:

“Although I understand that everyone – survivor or not – will at some point in their lives trust someone they shouldn’t, it seems to me that the experience of emotional abuse makes our trust meter go haywire.”

In this mini-podcast she (under her previous screen name Monkey) shares some more of her thoughts on the process of learning to trust again.

Approximately 20 minutes

(right-click here to download)

Mags mentions some articles and references. You can find them here:


we love to read your comments below



Having gained experience while working for a variety of European non-profits, I am proud to now work with SwanWaters. My connection with the website is not only professional. I am glad to tap into my personal experiences to help those who are living in toxic relationships whether with parents, partners or in their professional life. We need to make the world more aware of the devastating effects of emotional abuse and help more people on their way to heal and thrive.
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  1. Profile photo of KG

    May 13, 2015 at 10:31 pm

    Awesome stuff, Monkey! So recognisable too; the switching between not trusting and trusting too much. I don’t always feel if someone is safe or not and can get suspicious in hind sight as well.
    Also; not having any privacy at home being the cause of not having experimented with boundaries. I still experience the reporting back to home base; I think I’m the only sibling who doesn’t feel obliged to.
    I hope one day the trust will be back where it belongs; in our hearts.
    I also hope I can feel safe on SwanWaters, but maybe I’ve plunged in too deep and will have to back track. (We’ll see.)
    Today I talked with s.o. about sharing stuff with partners and them using it against you. I think this mirrors what happened at home and I hope that as one heals, one attracks safer partners as well. To me this is very important.

  2. Profile photo of Willow May
    Willow May

    May 11, 2016 at 2:43 am

    Hi Monkey,
    I’m new here, I’m listening to your podcasts and I would like to read your story. Can you please direct me to where to find the stories?
    Thank you

    • Profile photo of Monkey

      May 12, 2016 at 8:33 am

      Hey Willow May,

      Welcome to SwanWaters! I am so glad you found us. As for my story… many stories are shared on the forum ( and you can also have a listen of the Supporting Your Swan podcast that is listed above.

      I look forward to getting to know you!


      • Profile photo of Willow May
        Willow May

        May 23, 2016 at 8:22 am

        Thank you Monkey! I wrote out my story today – I am unwell and exhausted but I wanted to post something. I hope it makes sense.

        I only just saw your reply. I didn’t get a notification, I probably didn’t select notify when I joined.

        I look forward to getting to know you as well.

        Willow May

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