love triangle

Whether by denial, lying or being covertly abusive – phrasing what they say very carefully to intentionally hurt you – an abuser will use gaslighting as just one weapon in an arsenal of many. The tactic is used to alienate and isolate you from others, most especially your loved ones or co-workers.

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Realizing the true extend of the toxic family, and understanding that what happened was in fact abuse is a long and difficult journey. It is only the first step on our road to recovery, but it really is the most important one. That first step toward a better, more healthy life.

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Recently I had a conversation with some co-workers about who had worked for the worst boss. When I said: “I used to work for a boss that hit me”. I had clearly marked the winner. “Why did you not just leave the job?” my friend asked astonished. Of course I did leave the job eventually, but it took me a few years, and some major health scares to realize what was going on.

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