Financial Abuse

This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  CaringSis 4 years, 3 months ago.

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  • #5004

    Mags
    Keymaster

    We recently published a podcast on Financial Abuse (you can find it here).

    We are keen to hear your stories. Could you relate to what was said in the podcast? Is there any additional advice you would like to share?

    Fly Free, H

  • #5006

    CaringSis
    Participant

    I truly wish I had known about this 4yrs ago, so I could have shared this with my my poor sis and she could have had more insight to her NARC POS ex.

    What I have found out from sis:
    He made her feel guilty into making her set up a sole joint bank account when they married. There was many a time my family would constantly tell her to get a separate account but she never did. He enjoyed spending her wage.
    He bought a huge plasma TV without consulting my sis and when she found out there money was the kids child support money, she had a big argument with him. He said it would benefit them all (really?). Sadly, she gave in for a ’quiet life’.
    He would book a holiday online with their money. Again, without it being a joint decision. He always wants to go on holidays abroad. In debt but still happy to charge the joint credit card. Sis paid off the debt. My family would always be upset that she would give in to him. We knew they really couldn’t afford it. Maybe we were in wrong to moan to sis about the ex but at the time sis never told us the truth.
    He expected my sis to pay for his rent during trial separation and didn’t but bought some items for the place (and lied to us about it). 6 months later he moved into new target (mistress he was cheating with) home. New target had her own home with no mortgage. Ex and new target moved closer to sis but he claims new target has bought this house. The ex is all about money and is jealous of anyone who is successful.
    I really need my sis to read up more. She has had no true counselling and I don’t want to keep going on about it.
    If I look into my own family, I think my father was a narc. I think he used my mother. He was a bigamist. We had a couple of businesses but he would make all of us work in them and he would show off and take the money, and gamble at times. Selling our old house without my mothers knowledge upset me. I found out, years later, that my father threatened our lives when mother was in hospital recovering from cancer. He knew mother had a large amount of money in the house and wanted it. Mother told him where it was as she feared he would hurt us. I don’t think he would have as he was a coward. After my mother split from him, he enjoyed all the benefits from the businesses and we had nothing to show for all the years of running them. I sometimes think my mother refuses to talk about everything. She moans to me about the money when I choose to visit my half brothers and I get a bit annoyed and say you didn’t fight for it at the time.
    I think my sis married someone a bit like my dad…only her ex is much more a nut job and out to hurt her financially.

    Sorry to go on.

    I do appreciate all you do on this site.

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