There are a number of terms and abbreviations that you will encounter on this site and so a glossary seemed appropriate. Here are some of the more commonly used ones:

ACoN = Adult Child of Narcissist

Black Swan Swamp = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

DBF = Dear Boy Friend

DD = Dear Daughter

DDIL = Dear Daughter In Law

DGF = Dear Girl Friend

DH = Dear Husband

DoNM = Daughter of Narcissistic Mother

DS = Dear Son

DSIL = Dear Son in Law

Duck = Trouble Person (find out more)

Duck Family = Family of Origin

Dust Bath = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

DW = Dear Wife

EF = Enabling Father (find out more)

Euphoria Falls = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

EM = Enabling Mother (find out more)

Emotional Bullies = people who create emotional mayhem (find out more)

Engulfing Parent = a parent who has no boundaries with their victim and views the victim as merely an extension of themselves

Fauxpology = a false apology; an apology delivered in such a way that it incorporates a dig. Like saying to an obviously distraught person “I’m sorry that you got upset by what I said,” which blames the victim for being upset, rather than taking responsibility for the upsetting words that were uttered

FIL = Father In-Law

Fleas = Duck-like behaviour traits displayed by a Swan, generally learned behaviors from having been raised by a trouble parent and not knowing what is normal for the situation

Flying monkeys = people who do the Trouble Parent’s bidding, whether to inflict additional torment or to simply spy on the victim or spread gossip

FOO = Family of Origin

Gaslighting = a form of psychological abuse in which false information is presented with the intent of making a victim doubt his or her own memory and perception (find out more)

GC = Golden Child, the favored child(ren) in the FOO

Hoovering = the Trouble Parent’s attempt to bring an “escaped” victim back into the fold in order to resume the Nsupply. Previously ignoring parents may suddenly become inexplicably attentive, previously engulfing parents may offer unexpected apologies for vague previous transgressions, whatever it takes to get the victim back into the fold and resume Nsupply

Ignoring Parent = a parent who largely ignores (even neglects) the victim until or unless they are pushed into providing proper attention by an outside source or need of some kind

LC = Limited Contact

LC Comfort Nest = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

Malignant Narcissism = a degree of narcissism in which the N feels it is acceptable to proactively victimize another, up to and including physical violence

MIL = Mother In-Law

NC = No Contact

NC Ice Lake = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

NF = Narcissistic Father / Trouble Father (find out more)

Normie = a normal person; someone who has not experienced emotional abuse

NM = Narcissistic Mother / Trouble Mother (find out more)

NPD = Narcissistic Personality Disorder (find out more)

Nrage = the outpouring of rage from an N when thwarted in their expectations

NSupply or NFeed = the ego gratification the N receives, usually as a result of exploiting others

Projection = the act of attributing to another one’s own feelings, beliefs, attitudes, prejudices, motives, expectations and/or reactions.

Scapegoat = the blamed individual who can do no right

Self-Sabotage Quicksand Pit = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

Shedding Station = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

Swan = Survivor of Emotional Abuse

Swan Family = Family of Choice (find out more)

Swan Lake = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)

Swan Path = The healing path of a Swan (find out more)

Swan Mate = Healthy romantic partner of a Swan

Toxic People =  People who create emotional mayhem (find out more)

Triangulation = indirect communication; one person acts as messenger between two others, often altering or fabricating the message to suit the tale bearer’s objective. Mother tells the child, for example, “your father is upset with you because you didn’t take out the trash,” when, in fact, the father hasn’t even noticed. Mother may then tell father “apparently Johnny thinks it is your job to take out the trash, not his…” thereby creating conflict between father and son.

Whirlpool of Depression = a place on the healing path of the Swan (find out more)



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